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Mumble,Mumble.....(Part 13)

13....hmmmm...unlucky for some (I'm even writing this on the 13th of the month too), nah I couldn't be anymore unlucky than some people who have their private sex life bared for all in a news report, what a starr!  Looks like the warning shot he fired off only served to incriminate him...oh well enough of the strange dietary habits of the rich and famous.

Some parts of the body apparently give a clue to your fertility.  Researchers at the Liverpool University spend all their time working out that if a man has symmetrical hands and long ring fingers, he's fertile and if a woman has long index fingers they are more likely to bear children.  Does this mean that us women will now have to put up with yells of "show us your hands"? 

It's a dangerous world out there.  A man in Florida is suing a topless dance club for whiplash injuries sustained from oversized breasts of one of the dancers.  I wonder if he'll need re-constructive surgery to his face to wipe the permanent smile of it?

I read the other day that you can increase your brain power by drinking eight glasses of water a day, rubbing the skin between your toes,chewing peppermint gum and coming up with wrong answers and I figured that I must be brainy because I'm always coming up with wrong answers. But when I tried to drink the water I kept gagging on the peppermint gum that was stuck between my toes...I guess I'll just have to stay relatively dumb then.

The Herald-Sun newspaper ran a short story competition here recently and my favourite piece was written by Gerry Walsh. 

"Ho Ho Ho" They had warned him, "You have to be a good boy or Santa won't bring you any presents for Christmas."  Of course he knew all parents said that so he wasn't worried. But they really had meant it.   The reindeer's head in his bed proved that.

I should have read that one out to my kids....

And last but not least... A british professor had a microchip implanted so that when he entered rooms lights came on, a bath is run and wine is chilled when he steps in the door. I'll be the first to order three, but I want mine to automatically close doors and turn off lights when leaving a room, make me a cup of tea and most importantly, put the toilet lid down!  You can guess which members of the household I'm referring to....and one of them is the dog!

part 12   Part 14